Monday, February 01, 2010

Are You Victoria's Secret Bathing Suit Ready? The 2010 Edition

It's that time of year again all you Moms out there!  Suck it in, stick them out, and prepare to be dazzled by Vicky's 2010 TOTALLY PRACTICAL swimwear line!

This one is for all you crafters out there:  Origami!

Or if you prefer, Hand Shredded!  Totally practical.  Cuz if your suit snags (like they always do) NO ONE WILL EVEN KNOW!


Free your inner cavewoman.  Bone for hair not included.

How 'Bout Them Tan Lines?

Her right boob apparently CANNOT BE CONTAINED.

The For God's Sake Eat a Sammich Swimsuit

The female version of Borat's suit.  Super practical for those postpartum breastfeeding mothers out there! 

But for those of you who are a bit modest, there's always the option of the full coverage swim skirt!

*****
I'm so honored that this post has won:



26 comments:

Amy said...

I love when you do this. "Bone for hair not included" cracked me UP.

The breast feeding one kills me.

I admit to liking that first one.

The second one is flat ugly no matter how you look!

Rita/Fighting Off Frumpy said...

Heyyyy, how'd you get these pictures of me ...? ;)

beenomom said...

Sarah, you have out done yourself on this one! I'm sitting her LMAO!! I love the breastfeeding super practical suit! I can't stop laughing!!!

The commentary rocks!

Jen said...

Yeah, I am so going to run right out and get me one of those swimsuits....


NOT!

Jeannie, Jane, Angel, Mommy, etc.. said...

O.k., these are hilarious.

Michelle said...

I'm fairly certain that first one was made with a Cricut machine.

Fairly Odd Mother said...

What? A swim suit where you actually have to worry about bikini-line hair? What's the point?

And that breastfeeding one is ridiculous. Especially if you don't have long hair.

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

Finally! Manufacturers are making swimsuits that will suit my middle-aged post-baby body. Phew.

Suburb Sierra said...

Suit #4 is made for the family, really. The kids can practice the cat's cradle for hours while Mom gets some sun.

Odd that my catalog hasn't arrived - I'm pretty sure I'm their target market.

The Cookie Girl said...

OMG These are so darn funny!
Thanks for the laugh today. I needed it.

Vodka Logic said...

I am now seriously depressed..Odd suits but couldn't wear them if my life depended on it.

Manic Mommy said...

Love the Borat - totally practical.

Where are the swim burquas?

Jennifer Juniper said...

The nursing suit was my fave! I'm never eating again...

countryfriedmama said...

There are not enough Pilates hours in the day... Pass the donuts.

SLC said...

OMG! that was funny. Loved your commentary.

Rachel Cotterill said...

I like the first one... and the red. Not sure that I'd really suit them, though.....

Maureen said...

painful... just painful...

thanks for the laughs.

Masala Chica said...

seriously. who wears this stuff? is this the brazil edition? And when did ribs get so attractive for swimsuit models? I thought they were moving towards more athletic builds. Its kind of ridiculous.

Kelli @ writing the waves said...

Oh yeah...I could definitely pull off the cave woman one.

Who wears these things?

Marinka said...

I will wear them all simultaneously. Because I'm modest.

Wendi said...

We thought this was so hilarious, Sarah!

--Wendi
(Mouthy Housewife extraordinaire)

GrandeMocha said...

Even at 18 I couldn't wear one of those. Now, forget about it!

sarah pekkanen said...

Brilliant! I love the boob with the mind of it's own: "I want the spotlight! I'm the better boob!"

Mary Ellen said...

hahaha!
You should win another award for this post:
Best one-liners. Seriously, where do you come up with them all???

Joie said...

I really appreciate you guys NOT making fun of me. I posed for EVERY SINGLE one of those. I am curvy, skinny, boobless, too boobed...I am a Victorias Secret Model.

heh.

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