So to multi-task, I decided I would walk down to the practice. With both Middle and Baby. In the jog stroller.
When I got home from work, the little guys hadn't eaten yet. Granny 911 was cooking pasta for them. I instructed her that they could eat on the fly because I wanted to get down to practice.
She looked at me questioningly. But how can they eat hot pasta in the stroller?
You cool it, and then throw it in 2 ziplock baggies. Insta-dinner!
Mother-of-the-Year right here.
Let the cross training begin!
1. Throw one 35 lb 5-year old into the stroller.
2. Throw one 32 lb 4-year old into the stroller next to his brother.
3. Be kinda thankful that your boys are runts.
4. Rush around the house to gather iPod for you (to drown out the whining) and an iPod for The Next American Idol.
5. Cave and let 4-year old bring his Nintendo DS and pray that he doesn't drop it out of the stroller.
6. Throw in some juice boxes and a water bottle.
7. Think that perhaps a baggie of pasta won't be enough for your already underweight offspring and run back into the house to quickly pop a bag of microwave popcorn for
8. Notice that you're already sweating but haven't gone anywhere yet.
9. Begin with delusions of grandeur in your head that you can RUN THE ENTIRE WAY whilst pushing 67 pounds of delightfulness.
10. After 1 minute and 24 seconds, stop running.
11. Wonder whether the stroller's tires are flat and perhaps THAT'S why you can't run.
12. Silently fume at Hubby for not pumping up the tires.
13. Make it to a steep downhill part and begin running again.
14. Scratch that, you're actually not running. You're being dragged.
15. Stop because Middle would like his bag of noodles now.
16. Begin moving again.
17. Stop because Baby is done playing Nintendo. He'd like his noodles now.
18. And a juice box.
19. Begin again.
20. Still being dragged downhill.
21. Make it to the main road. There's no sidewalk. Push stroller precariously on edge of busy road.
22. Take notice that every driver is looking at you and your fat sweatiness because both boyz are making faces and waving to every car.
23. Begin to run faster to get this bright idea OVER WITH.
24. Finally make it to a sidewalk. Baby asks if he can walk. You readily agree.
25. Wow, 35 pounds is easy to push.
26. 32 minutes later, you make it to football practice. Sweating.
27. Let all the football moms admire your dedication and physical fitness.
28. Shrug and say, "Aww, it was nothing."