You hear this phrase a lot when talking specifically about one's marriage, especially when said marriage involves children and careers.
Hubby and I are no exception.
Monday through Friday, we're like 2 ships passing in the
Our telephone conversations and e-mails during the week pretty much consist of such excitement as what's for dinner, or what our upcoming weekend plans are. Riveting, I know.
In the evenings, when I arrive home, Hubby is usually preparing dinner (yep), which gives me enough time to quickly change
After that, it's all about the boyz. Wii time (bowling! with blue balls and strap-ons!), baths, books, snuggles and bed.
Thankfully, the boyz are great sleepers. Always have been. So we don't have any bedtime issues (except for the bedwetting or the occasional pukeage, neither of which has occurred lately. Aaaandd with that...I probably just jinxed myself.) So when they're down for the night, they're down.
By this time, it's around 8:30. I'm tired. Hubby usually heads down into Mantown in the finished basement to watch sports on his big TV. I usually head down there as well, to sit in the adjacent room with the computer. Checking e-mails, reading blogs, surfing Facebook.
There is little to no interaction between the 2 of us. Eventually one of us retires to bed first (usually me) and is asleep before the other one comes upstairs.
Lather, rinse, repeat.
Lately though, there's been a slight change. A change for the better, I must say.
After we put the boyz to bed, Hubby and I have both been retiring into the sunroom. Together. (I'm not sure what brought about this change in his routine. I have a hunch though, that it's simply warmth. It's MUCH warmer in the sunroom than in the basement.) So although most times we're sitting on separate couches and there is usually sports on the TV, I feel closer to him. I don't feel the urge to be on the computer as much. Sitting in the same room initiates more conversations. It's good. Even though I still go to bed earlier, and am usually asleep by the time he comes to bed, I don't feel as isolated.
So often it's easier to just NOT DEAL with the whole marriage dynamic, don't you think? Instead, we focus on the children, the career(s), the house, the money, the blahblahblah.
That's why I'm a huDge advocate of date nights and the rare weekend getaways. And now, simply SITTING IN THE SAME ROOM TOGETHER. To remember. To remember what life was like before all the craziness. To remember why you fell in love. To remember what attracted you in the first place. To remember.
EDITED TO ADD:
Hubby weighs in (via e-mail):
"I sit up there in the sunroom because maybe I miss sitting in a room with you for more than dinner. Are you happy now that I admit that?
Love you. Good blog."