Tuesday, June 05, 2007

There's a Fungus Among Us

To pick up where I left off on Friday night, it didn't get any better. In fact, it got worse. Eldest entered our bedroom at 1am Saturday morning, throwing up. Poor little buddy was a limp noodle, laying down next to the toilet in between bouts, just pressing his face to the cold tile in our bathroom. So I ended up sleeping on the couch downstairs, because he wanted to sleep with Daddy. (Umm...nope, my feelings weren't hurt. Especially since he proceeded to puke in the bed with Daddy at 2am and Daddy had to get up and strip the bed and remake it.)

Saturday morning started bright and early at 6am. The neighborhood yard sale, remember? I woke up, feeling a little queasy, but attributed it to the early cocktail hour(s) from the day before. Dragged, hauled and pushed all our crap valuable resale items to the end of the driveway, while Hubby had Boyz Duty. To make a long story short, the yard sale was profitable. Made $150 and got rid of lots of junk treasure! Still felt queasy and had a few bathroom trips during the morning. Cleaned up the yard sale, showered...oh and by the way? It was easily the hottest, most humid day of the year so far...that didn't help the nausea any. At all.
Attempted to hang out with my Hubby and the boyz after showering. Laid on the couch wrapped in a fleece blanket, moaning to myself in my head (and not in the good way). Yep, I caught it. The dreaded "liquid coming out both ends of me" bug. Curled up in the fetal position in bed by 5pm and stayed that way through Saturday night.

Woke up Sunday feeling much better, after my "17 hours of sleep" as my Hubby so sensitively mentioned. We all laid low on Sunday, not wanting to share our germs with anyone else.

Cut to last night. In the middle of typing this post, Hubby yelled for me. Normally, I don't answer him and pretend not to hear when he tries to bellow to me from more than 1 room away, but as I was typing, I had heard the toilet flush like 15 times. Hmmm....Went up to check on him and whaddya know? He's curled up in the fetal position in the middle of our bedroom floor. Moaning. He, who had bragged that he was like Seinfeld:

[setting: Elaine's office and Jerry's apartment]
(Elaine's on the phone with Jerry)
JERRY: No eight years isn't such a long streak.
ELAINE: It isn't?
JERRY: No I haven't vomited in thirteen years.
ELAINE: Get out!
JERRY: Not since June 29, 1980.
ELAINE: You remember the date?
JERRY: Yes, because my previous vomit was also June 29th... 1972. That's why during the '80 vomit, I was yelling to George: "Can you believe it? I'm vomiting on June 29th again."
ELAINE: Boy, you know when Joel told me he hadn't thrown up in eight years, I was wondering if he was normal.
JERRY: Your boyfriend is a normal guy. He just happens to have the same name as one of the worst serial killers in the history of New-York.
From Season 5, Episode: The Masseuse

Yeah, well, the streak was broken. And I have to say, Hubby is the LOUDEST PUKER I have EVER heard. It was nasty. So much so, that I almost felt compelled to retch just listening to him. Almost.

So hopefully the worst is over. (*knocking on my wooden desk right now*) Middle and Baby seem to have lucked out (totally jinxing myself now, huh?)--Baby had diarrhea on Friday, but otherwise is still our human garbage disposal, while Middle hardly ate a bite all weekend, and every once in awhile would double over and announce, "My belly hurts!" But he's back to "normal" (heh) today. As am I (heh heh). And Eldest has been fine since Sunday.

But in order to protect the safety of everyone around us, the Trenches will remain quarantined until the chaos begins on Friday, whereupon the Griswalds my family will arrive in town for the weekend to celebrate my Niece's dance recital and Middle's 3rd birthday. The fun just never ends!


Natalie said...

Oh gosh,I hope you guys are all feeling much better soon! On May 14th, my husband, myself, and my mom all got violently ill (pukefest '07), and guess who was healthy as a lark? Yup, the bored off his bummy child (which I was thankful for). Normally this would present an interesting situation, but my son totally stepped up to the plate and took care of us in the best way he could. He let us laze around all day long. I know. Shocking.

I feel for you and your family, puking is the worst, especially when it just.won't.stop. I hope you are ALL healthy soon!

Sisters with Style said...

It sounds like everybody is out of the woods. What a tough weekend you guys had. Hopefully this weekend will be 100% better.

Cate said...

Oh no...that's awful! I hope that you are all out of the woods on this one!

hqm said...

I can't imagine the amount od laundry that produced! Glad to hear everyone is on the mend!

Sarah said...


We had that bug earlier in the year.

And why is it that men have to puke so loudly? Is it attention-seeking behavior?

Lindy said...

at least the worst appears to be over. Hope you have fun w/ the gris...eer I mean your family

Anonymous said...

OH NO!!! I hope you all feel better... It sounds like what I feel like everyday these days! NOT FUN!

Ms. Skywalker said...

When Big A was sick, I was worried about her because she puked so quietly. When I voiced my concern to my friend, she told me it was because I was the loudest puker ever.

Then my sister watched her for me, and she said, "She pukes so quiet".

Jennifer said...

Yuck...especially the loud puking. Having a sick husband is almost worse than sick kids,

k e r r y said...

I wonder what you all had/have? No fun at all that's for sure. Puking is the worst. I have to say... I think you lucked out having him sleep in bed with dad that night - anything to escape stripping the bed in the middle of the night!

Anonymous said...

UGH! I hope you guys are all on the road to recovery... we've had 2 pukefests in our house in the last 5 months! With the new baby home I'm practically begging the germs to stay away from the 2 older boys... I'm about to promise anything to them if they just stay the heck away!
- Audrey
Pinks & Blues Girls

tinamtl said...

Glad you are all feeling better.

(I remember that Seinfeld epidode) hahaha

Cherann said...

The Breadwinner pukes really loud too. Maybe it's a guy thing.

Just think...all the unsuspecting people that bought stuff from your garage sale may be puking now too... if they didn't wash their hands.

hot potato said...

i am sorry for your bad luck... but as far as your ability to creatively write about it had me in stitches. i love the seinfield recap and the account of scott on all fours. omg!

Olivia: (mostly) Happy Homemaker said...

TOO FUNNY!!! But SO NOT funny... we've all been there. "Happy" hubby would not be so happy about me sharing this but he is the only person I've ever heard actually SAY "R-A-L-P-H" when he vomits... it is literally "retched"!

Slackermommy said...

Bummer! We were the house of pukes and poops a few weeks ago. I'm still scrubbing puke stains out of the carpet. Hope your house gets well soon.

Heather said...

Oh yuck. I'm glad everyone is on the mend!


Related Posts with Thumbnails