Thursday, May 03, 2007

Real Moms. Finger Sweeping, Book Reading and Butt Wipin'....Hopefully Not All At The Same Time.

A Real Mom calmly and automatically suppresses her gag reflex and shudders of revulsion when her child has literally (or as Simon Cowell would say, "litra-lee") bitten off more than he can chew and proceeds to spit the enormous portion of regurgitated food back into her hand so that he doesn't choke...

A Real Mom ignores the dirty dishes and dusty furniture to simply sit on the floor criss-cross applesauce with a child curled on her lap to read the lovingly torn and tattered "Ten Little Ladybugs" for the zillionth time...

A Real Mom deftly changes a diaper, while talking on the phone, while reprimanding a preschooler to stop whining, while boiling water for pasta, while checking the clock and counting down the minutes until Hubby comes home from work and it's officially Wine Thirty.


Hey, you too can enter the Real Mom Truths contest! The winner will receive this 4G iPod Nano and Chocolate gift set, plus a link to their post on True Mom Confessions on Mother's Day.

And now, speaking of truths, I can't stop picturing Jack ("the Man") Nicholson with drops of spittle spewing out the sides of his mouth, jaw clenched, proclaiming, "You want the truth? You can't handle the truth."

11 comments:

Pinks & Blues Girls said...

Haha! This is great. I get such a kick out of you!

Good luck in the contest!

Don't forget about our Pinks & Blues Marc Jacobs bag contest on our site!!

Toni said...

'Wine Thirty'- I am gonna use that! I love the bottle of wine!

A said...

I love the title of this post!

nutmeg said...

My kids love that book. I'm not sure it's a realistic representation of the insect food chain! Wine-thirty. Brilliant!

Her Bad Mother said...

Real Moms are INDEED the masters (mistresses) of the gag reflex. Well-put.

Queen Heather said...

GREAT Real Moms post. I love it! And it is all so very true. You can watch your own kid spit out that chunk of food into your hand and it doesn't phase you but to see another kid do it....GAG!

sisters with style said...

I so what you mean about cooking dinner w/ 100 different things going on! I hate the 5:00 witching hour around our house!

navybluegirl said...

Can you trade mark wine thirty...hilarious! Then you could put a little tm by it ;-)

I'm tagging you for 7 things...don't know if you already have been... :-)

Shauna said...

Great post! This is our life, isn't it?
Good luck!

slouching mom said...

Wine-Thirty?

BWAHAHA!

Pinks & Blues said...

You are fabulously funny! As a Mom of 4 and a Grandma of 7, oh how many of your "Real Mom" tidbits hit home BIG time! I particularly recall driving to get milk early one morning, in my robe and pajamas, with my sick little girl Jane, and trying to figure out how to shift my car into 3rd gear after Jane threw up in my hand! Wonderful post!
Sharon - Pinks & Blues Girls

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